How do I find the good in a bad situation?
Not seeing the good in bad situations hinders your growth and path to a happy, joyous, and free life. Having this mindset impacts your courage to take risks and creatively solve the problems coming at you every day. Learning how to see the good in bad situations will unblock your creativity so you can take on anything that comes at you.
Forgive yourself for not knowing how to find the silver lining in the situations that challenge you. The truth is, you aren’t practiced in seeing challenges as growth. You’ve been shielded from challenges your entire life, so now, when life gets tough, you naturally shift into victim mode. Luckily you can change that with some shifts to your mindset.
Here are a few ways to start finding the good in bad situations and grow through your challenges.
If you’ve read my book The Resilient Mind- A field guide to a healthier way of life, you’ll know that I’m adamant about practicing gratitude. I use the word ‘practice’ because you have to do it every day. It’s difficult to become an expert because life’s challenges will show up and trick you into believing life sucks. Practicing gratitude will help you avoid believing that lie, thus protecting you from spiraling into a depressive episode.
Start your gratitude practice by keeping a notebook and writing down 5 things each day that you’re grateful for. Get creative. Try not to focusing on the obvious things to be grateful for, like food and a place to live.
Find the lesson.
Lessons are always painful when you’re going through them. Seeking the lesson will lead you to acceptance of what’s going on in your life. Once you accept the lesson, then you can shift your mindset into problem-solving mode. For example, I was in an unhappy marriage for many years. I had a mindset that my husband didn’t value me, and it was his fault that I wasn’t happy in the marriage. The lesson I learned in my marriage is, I needed to be happy with myself and not rely on another person to make me happy. The pain I was feeling was fear of addressing the parts of me I was unhappy with. As a result of accepting the lesson I needed to learn about myself, I decided to leave the marriage, and that’s when I found happiness within me.
The best way to find the lesson is by asking: What is this teaching me? Keep asking until you get to the answer.
Reflect on your choices.
Most of the time, you’re feeling like life is happening to you because you’re not spending time reflecting on your choices. You are in the situation you’re in because of your choices: good or bad. Once you accept that you’ve chosen your current situation, you can shift your mindset to choose a new situation. I know this is frustrating because you try so hard to make choices that have a favorable outcome. However, life happens, and a lesson is learned instead.
Create a daily or weekly practice reflecting on how your life is going. Don’t focus only on what didn’t go right. Also, celebrate the wins, no matter the size.
Life is not easy; however, it becomes amazing when you shift your mindset about your life experiences and your abilities to handle anything that comes your way.